Dillo Talk

Letters to Ellie

LETTERS TO ELLIE

“The Reason”

February 10, 2002

Hi Sweetheart,

“BIRRRRD!” It is late winter and you and I are driving slowly down a small dead-end lane outside of Wimberley, Texas. You are in your car seat in the back seat on the passenger’s side of the vehicle. A slight turn of my head allows me to look at you as we drive, and we exchange glances and giggles and funny expressions. The field on our right is a tawny, lion-colored yellow stand of knee-high grass. A magnificent, perfectly shaped tree intrudes into the otherwise open field by about 50 feet. The tree is barren, save for a few hundred brown leaves that refuse to give up their view of the surrounding countryside. Holding tightly to the highest branches, they seem to be alive as they battle the brisk north breeze, surely realizing they are destined to relinquish their spot to eventual new growth and must, in fact, fulfill their role in becoming the soil beneath the tree.

As we approach the tree, the leaves suddenly decide that they have a reason to leave in unison. They flutter upward and away; now, however, suddenly morphing into a synchronized flock of tiny brown sparrows. I turn my head to look at you, your head slightly cocked to the side, staring at the scene. That’s when I see it and hear it, as you purse your lips and say, “BIRRRRD!”

Imagine my surprise at finding myself unable to keep my eyes dry in the moments following your utterance of that word. It wasn’t the first word you’d said, for as a proud father I’d have to argue that “Dada” took that honor. Nor was it even the biggest word you were capable of. With encouragement and excited prompting from the adults in your life, you are quite capable of reproducing many of the traditional words we parents ask our little ones to repeat as we seek to impress our friends with how smart our baby is.

No, it is the situation I find myself in that causes that word to rip at my heartstrings. It hits me hard as I realize that moments like the one I just witnessed may, from this day forward, be few and far between for me. I won’t be able to tuck you into bed each evening, nor witness the triumphs and challenges in the daily life of a 20-month old. My life with my daughter is about to be condensed into alternating weekends and patches of extended stays that are granted to me by some court.

In my struggles to cope with the situation, I have begun a journal of sorts in which I hope to somehow capture the moments I do have with you. I am writing them as letters to you, recording special things you might say or do, things we do when we are together or maybe some thought I have about your life. Hoping that some day you will be able to read these letters and know that I was in your life when you were very young, and that I took every opportunity given me to be with you and share my life with you. Your brothers and you are “The Reason” I forge ahead.

I can tell already that you love animals and being outdoors. That is evident in the photos I have of you sitting in the middle of a shallow stream or riding in a wheelbarrow amongst the new kid goat crop. You have even accompanied me as I’ve shown Hill Country ranches to prospective buyers. Not sure what they thought of it, but you ate it up. My little girl, my daughter – the answer to many prayers – I miss you already and can’t wait to see you again.

Love, Daddy

Goin' Batty

OK, first of all you have to understand that in Texas we say “goin'.” If you say “going,” everyone will know immediately that you’re not from Texas. Anyway, we really are goin’ batty here in Texas and we’re surprisingly proud of it! Here in the beautiful Texas Hill Country we have a profusion of primarily Mexican free-tailed bats that arrive from south of the border every summer to deliver their young. It’s a girl thing, and the colonies of moms that raise their “pups” leave the dads behind in Mexico to do whatever dads do when the family is away.

The Congress Street Bridge colony in Austin is (I assume) world famous. Numbering up to an estimated 2-4 million bats, the only mammal that flies emerges every evening from under the bridge and wows thousands of spectators as they follow the course of the Colorado River like a dark cloud, off to their nightly hunt.

Pursuing the bat trail in Central Texas can lead you through some incredibly beautiful country. A few miles east of Fredericksburg, the Grapetown Road leads to an abandoned railroad tunnel where another couple of million bats raise their young and emerge into the night sky to hunt for their favorite meal, the corn earworm moth and the cotton bollworm moth. These furry little creatures eat so many of those moths each night that Texas farmers save many thousands of dollars in pesticide use every summer and, needless to say, all those pesticides never enter the environment.

As a birding enthusiast, I was recently treated to an evening at the famous Selah, Bamberger Ranch Preserve, where the world’s only known cave built specifically as a chiroptorium exists. Approximately 60,000 bats are using this cave as a nursery, and the emergence is as spectacular as anywhere else.

The most breathtaking emergence we witnessed this year was at Bracken Cave. This is a natural limestone cave close to San Antonio and is open by invitation only. The cave is owned by Bat Conservation International and the group hopes to fund the building of a visitor center and observatory. Now, the stunning part: it’s estimated that 20-40 million bats occupy the cave over the summer. To say that witnessing the phenomenon of this emergence is anything less than stunning is an understatement. This is the largest colony of bats in the world; in fact, the largest concentration of any mammal in the world. One of the monitors said he watched from 7:30 p.m.-1:00 a.m. one evening and the bats were still pouring out when he left. It’s really an incomprehensible number of anything, let alone something so active and vital.

Bat emergences are, of course, common and locally known in many areas of the world. What’s really amazing is when you are shown a radar map that documents the incredible density of this phenomenon. They ride the thermals to an altitude of 10,000 feet and are tracked by radar at the San Antonio airport so they can route incoming air traffic safely. Texas has truly embraced the bat craze. Even Austin’s hockey team is named the “Ice Bats.”

So what is it that draws thousands of quiet, almost silent spectators each year? This much-maligned and even feared animal is harmless (unless you’re a moth). And this phantom-like, almost mystical creature has captured our imaginations and hearts. We never really get a good look at them. Their flight is spastic and erratic and, at best, they appear as a swift silhouette against the sky or an immense gray/black smoke trail heading off on the hunt. Perhaps it’s our deeper understanding that the phenomenon of emergence has taken place for eons and is one of those timeless events that give us reason to reflect on our own place in the scheme of things. Then again, maybe we are thrilled by the spectacle simply because it’s so cool! It could be that’s all there is to it.

Skidboot the Dog

A heart-warming segment from Texas Country Reporter, with Bob Phillips. For more information visit www.TexasCountryReporter.com or www.skidboot.com